“I’m in recovery and I’ve been eating a lot more than usual. I think I’m developing binge eating disorder. I feel like I’m losing control around food. HELP!”
I can empathize with this feeling, I felt this way at the beginning of recovery as well. During the beginning when the extreme hunger was at its peak I didn’t know how to process what I was doing. I was scared, and it was emotional, and I all but completely convinced myself that this was binge eating disorder.
When you are recovering from an eating disorder or restrictive eating or chronic dieting, your body needs to replenish the backlog of caloric deficit that you have built up over the years. Even if you have been in quasi recovery for a long time. Your body still has not had the chance to metabolically restore itself to its set point. You will continue to get these strong urges to eat large amounts of food until your body has had its chance to properly heal. Until you are energy balanced and your metabolism is back to functioning optimally your body will continuously call out for more food. This desire to eat (and eat and eat and eat) is perfectly natural when you are recovering from disordered or restrictive eating. Your body heals itself through calories and eating what seems like a lot or a “binge-able amount” isn’t actually a binge but a natural bodily response to starvation (and/or restriction).
Eating disorders gain their power from control and often in recovery the hardest part is feeling the loss of that control. It’s a scary and difficult time to navigate, but just because it FEELS like you are going off the rails by eating a ton doesn’t mean you are developing a new psychopathy. Binge eating disorder is a very serious mental health disorder with many other symptoms and aspects other than just “eating a lot” and “feeling out of control”. When you are a person who is recovering from restrictive eating in any way, anorexia, orthorexia, EDNOS, or are in quasi recovery, responding to the extreme hunger that your body feels in recovery is not the same thing as having binge eating disorder.
The thought process that the unrestricted eating in recovery is actually BED is unbelievably common. Most people have a certain picture of what their recovery will look like and when it goes off the rails and outside the lines of the plan the reactions can be extreme. Recovery is about letting go of structure, numbers, and plans around food and just letting your body have what it truly needs. This is scary, but it’s a sign you are on the right path. Learning to become comfortable with the discomfort is a huge and important step forward. Your body knows what it wants and needs, and you should honor that to get yourself better.
ALSO – I’m having a giveaway over on my Instagram. The company Levoit has agreed to send one of my followers their super dope yoga kit. I’m super duper thriled because I have been looking for a way to thank you all for getting me to 1,000 subscribers on my Youtube channel!! If you are interested in entering the giveaway all of the details are on my instagram. Giveaway ends on 5/2/18.